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supercute1 37, Female, Rhode Island, USA - 15 entries

Nov 2010
7:14 PM EDT

quote

Courage does not always roar. Sometimes it is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow."- Mary Anne Radmacher

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Sportygirl15 32, Female, Michigan, USA - 119 entries

Nov 2010
1:05 PM EDT

Inboxjouranl isn't working again.... it wont let me sign in! ughhhh So now i have to use the thingy on my igoogle page but i can only post things, i cant veiw them or read them. NOOOOOOOOO

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charlax 71, Male, Arizona, USA - 744 entries

Nov 2010
2:20 AM MST

ici

im getting sick i dont ownt to get sick im blowing it out drinking lots of coffee found

Tags: ici

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ryanpdjoeyabkarenah 25, Female, Pennsylvania, USA - 11 entries

Nov 2010
1:48 PM EDT

IM SO BORED DONT WANT TO DO ANY THING HAVE A FEVER AND HAVE TO GO TO THE LIBARY :[ DONT WANT TO GO ;[

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ryanpdjoeyabkarenah 25, Female, Pennsylvania, USA - 11 entries

Nov 2010
1:44 PM EDT

I DO CARE AND IS IT THAT FAMOS CHIK THAT SING BULLETPROOF IF IT IS I LOVE THAT SONG AND IM SURE THAT DR.SEUSS WOULD LIKE THAT SONG

Tags: JENNA

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ryanpdjoeyabkarenah 25, Female, Pennsylvania, USA - 11 entries

Nov 2010
1:42 PM EDT

have fever have to go some were to the libary

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whoami? 40, Female, Nebraska, USA - 60 entries

Nov 2010
8:48 AM CST

If I Die Young #1

I write this because if I were to die young, I would want to leave something behind for my loved ones. Something for them to see into my life, my heart; see into me-their daughter, sister, friend, who is most likely so much more than what they knew. To no fault of theirs must I say, but to mine, maybe because I just don't know how and maybe I'm just plain scared.� I wonder every day if it's okay, all that I am. Maybe it's because I wonder if the person I am living my life as every day, is really me. If it is, why is there so much more to me below the surface that I can't seem to reveal or even understand myself. I want to just be me, stop trying to be perfect and�better; stop tyring to fix myself, to improve, to impress. I want to just stop. But I can't.

But the point of this is, when I go, if young or old, up to this point in my life, I want people to read about who I am when I'm alone. What my thoughts say about me. These thoughts are real. These feelings are real, they are powerful. My thoughts and feelings can beat me to a bloody pulp, yet no one knows, because this woman has the ability to put on a happy face, pull up her big girl panties,�dress in her beautiful white gown�and deal with it in order to function in society-to get my job done. For the middle portion of my life thus far, depression has fought me hard and beat me many times. God has gotten me through the larger portion of it, as well as an eating disorder, but every day...every....day...I deal with these two issues. I fight to stay positive and not be controlled by disordered eating. But the battle is who I am. The battle is never over. Never. I wish I could say I have overcome both and I am so perfectly redeemed today, but I would be lying, in fact in not verbally facing these issues to my friends and family, I think I am lying. But no one wants to hear this. They have problems of their own, and I am way too much to handle. After so many years of facing the same issues, you just get sick of hearing it. At least I do. I get sick of dealing with these same things.

I want so much to believe in the power of the Holy Spirit. I want so much to believe He is within me and working through me every day. But I am sorry to say, I find that my flesh is much more powerful than he is, because my flesh wins much more often than He does. Maybe He chooses not to work because I ask with wrong motives or I need to learn something. But that just goes to prove that I do it all wrong. I don't know how to do this "God thing" right. I limit God every day because I don't do it right. I don't have enough faith, I don't pray without ceasing, I don't recall scripture that applies, I don't remember lessons that I've already learned, I try to rely on my own power, I try to be perfect. I know these go against scriptural truths, but becauase I don't apply them, shows I do it all wrong!

Oh how I wish I could walk with joy in my step, with pure faith, and with power that has overcome these battles for good. To live every day with joy and a thankful heart no matter the circumstances. To eat responsibly and with self control. To know what is good for me and what to refrain from, to know what is best for my temple. I guess this is my prayer. Maybe one day while I'm still living this victory will be won, but if not, know that if I die young, victory will be mine. Please rejoice for me, for then I would truly be free.

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1 comment(s) - 06:56 PM - 11/08/2010

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ryanpdjoeyabkarenah 25, Female, Pennsylvania, USA - 11 entries

Nov 2010
7:57 AM EDT

and u need to lissen to nelly just a dream

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1 comment(s) - 10:28 PM - 11/08/2010

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lex 44, Female, California, USA - 137 entries

Nov 2010
3:11 AM PST

Rain Rain

It's raining! I love it to just be in bed on a� Sunday� morning watching the rain makes it feel like home. very east coast and lovely but at some point have to find some motivation to go to the gym. Three times a week! Allison and� I have a bet.

Sad news last week my high school friend Kristinia her mom passed� away. so incredibly sad so� sudden and� so tragic. accidental overdose of xanax� and she was probably drinking.� So sorry for her family and def have been thinking about them all week and called to leave her a voicemail and started crying I just couldn't imagine loosing my mom could not even imagine it.

Rose has been in the hospital she had her gallbladder out and now I know what the gallbladder does hahaha! but she is in recovery and man it was not fun visiting her in the hospital i hate hospitals just don't ever want to be chronically ill. it would just� be too much for me. I think this is the turn around that she needs to get her weight under control so I hope she gets better and does make a change.

Talking about change I'm thinking about going vegetarian for the most part. Trying to eat up all the turkey and stuff this week but starting next week def changing my diet just feel the need too. It is def time to change. and also thinking about doing online dating again? what do you think? yah it wasn't a wild success last year but it gave me a lot of confidence� and experience. Now that I have had a second serious relationship i def feel more confident in myself and what I'm looking for. couldn't hurt right? Haha I don't know maybe at the start of next year.� Taking some me time right now and it's fantastic. Starting a darkroom class tomorrow!! very excited to get back into something that I always loved and hopefully will get some amazing prints too

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ryanpdjoeyabkarenah 25, Female, Pennsylvania, USA - 11 entries

Nov 2010
9:56 AM EDT

HEY MY FIREND IS HERE AND HER NAME IS LIV AND SHE IS FUN TO PLAY WIT AND SHE CAN SOME TIMES BE OCWERED AND SHE NICE AND REALL NAME IS OLIVIA

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